Minding Our Elders - A voice for caregivers | Blog on eldercare and aging

Minding Our Elders Blog

A vintage black and white photo of an old man in a gold shirt and sweater. He is my neighbor Joe taken from my book Minding Our Elders.

Being an Effective Care Partner May Mean Stepping Back

In healthy partnerships, a relationship is built on our ability to trust that the other person has our best interests in mind....

A woman with short brown hair sits in a wheelchair with her head turned toward another woman with long brown hair who appears to be a caregiver. In the lower left corner is a circle that shows a turquoise SenecaSense pod.

Experiencing Incontinence? Restore Comfort and Confidence with SenecaSense Home

No more unnecessary brief checks. Get smart alerts when it’s the right time to replace the brief SenecaSense Home: Discreet Support That...

An indoor image of Leslie Kernisan, MD MPH. She stands against a gray background wearing a dark dress jacket open over a dark top with black beads and dainty earrings. She looks into the camera with a soft smile.

Free Caregiver Training with Support from a Geriatrician and More

Caregivers are often thrown into an unknown world of medication management and handling cognitive challenges. With little or no medical training, this...

A woman in a bright gold sweater sits on a couch with her back turned to a man, hand help out to keep him at bay. The man looks at her as if arguing. Both are upset.

Caregiver Asks How to Politely Refuse Unhelpful Visitors

Dear Carol: I’m an only child providing care for my dad, who has PTSD from military service, exacerbated by dementia. Before this,...

This closeup image shows a young woman with light blonde hair. fair skin, and blue eyes. Her hair is cut into a short bob with long front hair over one eye. She's looking to the side so what we see of her face if sad with a slightly reddened nose.

10 Common Causes of Caregiver Guilt

Wouldn’t it be nice to be a family caregiver who never gets frustrated and is an eternal optimist? Maybe there are some...

The background is an indoor wall in muted cream. Foreground is a frustrated woman with an Afro that is parted on the side. She has brown skin and is wearing a light tourquoise ribbed turtleneck sweater with long sleeves. Her elbows are bent and hands are held up in the air in frustration or anger.

How to Cope with Alzheimer’s Caregiver Burnout

You watch your once mentally sharp loved one decline before your eyes. Their uncontrollable behaviors, mood swings, outbursts, confusion, and memory loss...

The indoor image shows a bare white wall with shading. The foreground shows a dramatically frowning older man with a bald head and no glasses. His head is slightly tipped upward to show off his frown. He's wearing a navy blue suit with a white shirt and red knotted tie.

Detaching with Love: Setting Boundaries with Difficult Elderly Parents

When the family member we are trying to care for is critical, impossible to please or emotionally abusive, long-standing family dynamics are...

Top 3 Excuses from Siblings who Don’t Help With Caregiving

Unfair as it may seem, even in families with many adult children, one sibling usually becomes the primary caregiver for their aging...

We see an older man wearing a white tee and drk pants sitting in a whieel chair. A pleasant looking young woman has her hands on the chair handles as if steaing him. She learns forard slightly as if speaking to him. Her clothing looks like white scrubs. Behind them are white sheers drawn over large windows.

How to Convince Your Parent Who Needs Help to Move to Assisted Living

Conventional wisdom says that we all want to stay in our own homes for as long as we can. That is likely...

Cover of Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. The background is a sepia-toned room. In the foreground is a picture of the author's father, sitting in a contemplative pose with arms crossed. This image is also sepia-toned in browns of different shades. To the right is the book title.

Coping with the Stigma of Dementia

People stare. Most are not unkind; they are just curious. But when someone “different” from the norm becomes part of their environment,...

Cover of Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. The background is a sepia-toned room. In the foreground is a picture of the author's father, sitting in a contemplative pose with arms crossed. This image is also sepia-toned in browns of different shades. To the right is the book title.

You Can’t Prevent Parents’ Decline from Age, but Your Support Is Priceless

Dear Carol: Providing care for my parents is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It’s not so much the time and effort involved,...

this indoor image has a blurred background. IN the foreground we see a man with clipped brown hair and a receeding hairline who wears a cream golf-style shirt with some muted stripes. He has brown skin. He wears an unhappy frown and he looks slightly toward the side.

How to Cope If an Older Adult Is Always Complaining and Being Negative

You took your mom to the doctor, and she’s upset with you because the appointment took too long. You helped Dad with...

We see two middle-aged adults sitting at a distance on a couch, clearing aging. The woman on the left had her head turned away. She has shoulder length brown hair and is wearing a white shirt. Her arms are folded in defiance. The male on the right also has his head turned away and sits with arms folded. He has brown hair and is wearing a blue, long-sleeved shirt.

How to Handle Siblings in Denial About a Parent’s Declining Health

Nearly all family caregivers with siblings have experienced some version of sibling denial regarding their aging parents. Whether it stems from a...