Family and Professional Caregivers Are More Alike Than Different
Most of us who are family caregivers know that, while we often experience a sense of fulfillment when we provide care for our loved ones, there’s also a significant risk of emotional and physical burnout. Elder care experts and caregiving veterans urge those new to this role to seek out respite opportunities early on, but many family caregivers are wary of putting their loved ones’ care in a stranger’s hands.
If an adult child or spouse is struggling to care for their parent or significant other, how is it that a professional caregiver would be able to understand this person’s nuanced care needs, devote themselves to meeting them and exercise compassion for their situation? At first glance, a stranger may seem ill equipped to take on this very personal task, but you might be surprised. You may also be surprised to learn that professional caregivers are also at risk for occupational hazards like burnout.
A Family Caregiver’s Experiences with Professional Caregivers: As a family caregiver, I faced the task of placing several loved ones in a quality nursing home near where I lived. Over the years, I came to know many professional caregivers very well. They treated me with kindness and respect, and I did my best to be the type of family member who helped without interfering and respected their professionalism. In many cases, I was stunned by their unwavering ability to power through this difficult job, even as they continually faced the illness, pain, and eventual deaths of people they’d grown to care about.
Examples crowd my mind as I write because I saw so much dedication and concern while observing these skilled and compassionate people. However, the first and perhaps most touching experience that comes to mind happened with my uncle’s primary Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA), Holly. As my uncle slipped over the earthly threshold into eternity, Holly struggled far more than I did with his passing.
I loved my uncle and had terrific memories of him from my childhood and youth. When he fell ill and began to decline, I became part of his care team. It was a natural progression that I’d gradually grown to accept as elders in my family began requiring more and more of my time and assistance.
Although Holly had only known my uncle as a sick and rather cantankerous elderly man, she’d grown to care deeply for him, even during his most difficult times. As he lay dying, Holly would stop by his room every chance she could. She stood by his deathbed with me, tears streaking her face. Holly, ever the professional, went forward…
Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. “For anyone having to walk the last segments of life with a loved one, read this.” …Delores
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