Grandma’s Constant Calls for Help Are Hurting Dad’s Health
Dear Carol: I’m worried about my 70-year-old dad who is constantly responding to his 93-year-old mother’s calls for help. I keep telling him that he needs to move Grandma from her condo to assisted living. Dad says she refuses, and he doesn’t want to force the issue. Grandma raised Dad as a single mother, and my mom died young, so he was a single father and extra sensitive to family struggles. I step in when I can, but I live and work out of town and have kids to care for. Should I keep nagging him to make her move or step back? Is there something I can legally do to make this happen? Thanks for your thoughts. – LS
Dear LS: You’re a loving daughter with good insight. You might already know that this situation is not unusual, but when families experience it firsthand, it’s frustrating. Most people want to live their lives out in their own homes, so if not forced by circumstances, they’ll stay where they are. We can’t blame them, but living alone is rarely safe for people your grandma’s age. Can you force this? Absent certain legal documents…
Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. “For anyone having to walk the last segments of life with a loved one, read this.” …Delores
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