Revisit Dying Parent’s End-Of-Life Goals Before Pressuring Them to “Fight”
Dear Carol: My mom has late-stage cancer as well as dementia and is being cared for in my home with hospice support. She’s 93, very weak, and going downhill fast. Thankfully, they can give her medication for what would otherwise be unbearable pain. We’re deeply grateful. Mom’s reasonably alert most afternoons, so I’d like to see her try harder to maintain strength by allowing me to help her stand, and maybe walk a tiny bit. I’ve read about how even small amounts of exercise can extend life, and I really want her to fight harder to live. She tells me that she’s tired and wants to be “left in peace.” Do you know of any way that I can motivate her? She seems to be giving up, and I don’t want to lose her. – HJ
Dear HJ: I’m so sorry about your mom’s declining health and what you’re going through as you accompany her during her transition. Should she “fight harder?” While it might be all right to…
Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. “For anyone having to walk the last segments of life with a loved one, read this.” …Delores
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