Relationships

The image has a dark indoor background. In the foreground is an older woman with darker, wrinkled sking and very short white hair. She's wearing brown rimmed glasses and a top that has blue and white sleeves and trim with a deep red vest like shoulder. Her expression shows her eyes turning left and her mouth as if she's speaking bitter words.

Caring for Aging Parents Who Didn’t Care for You

Years ago, a journalist (we’ll call her Nancy) requested an interview with me to discuss common caregiving issues for an article she was writing....

The view is from the top looking down on a desk. We see the arms in a person with a white medical coat. They have the bulb from a blood pressure cuff in their hand as they measure blood pressure of the patient. The patient is seen from the back. He has short dark hair and is wearing a light blue, casual long-sleeved shirt.

Caregiver Needs Help Preparing for New Doctor in Different Network

Dear Carol: Since my mother’s doctor is retiring, she’s going to try someone recommended by a friend. The challenge is not just changing doctors, which...

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Caregiver Guilt: How to Stop Feeling Guilty About Aging Parents

Get used to it – the guilt, I mean. The incessant phone call thing was just one of the many games I had to...

The cover of Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Own Stories is done in brown and sepia tones. The background image is a room interior. Inthe foreground is a picture of the authors father, a man with a receding hairline, dark-rimmed glasses, and a light shirt. He sites with his arms crossed in front of him with a contemplative expression.

A Story from the Sandwich Generation: Caring for Kids and Parents

Watching out for elders has always come naturally for me. I grew up close to my grandparents, and during my teenage years, my paternal...

A man or woman with a short mop of curly auburn hair, mostly covers their face with their hands. The viewer can see tears on the check and one eye that can be seen. They are wearing a black turtlenecked, long-sleeved sweater.

Is It Normal to Grieve long Before Someone Dies?

Nearly everyone involved in caring for an ill or aging loved one is experiencing some degree of grief. However, we don’t usually identify the...

An older man sitts on the left, looking at a younger woman who is smiling at him as if explaining something. The man has gray hair and is wearing a beige shirt. The woman has long brown hair tied in a low ponytail. She's wearing blue scrubs and has a stethoscope around her neck.

Hospice Care: Help During End Stages of Life

One day while I was working at my newspaper job, the phone rang. It was the head nurse at Dad’s nursing home. “Carol, we...

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Music-Thanatology: Providing Harmony at the End of Life

The mission of hospice providers is to help people live their last months or weeks of life in the most comfortable, dignified and satisfying...

An indoor image shows a white-tiled kitchen in the background. The foreground, an older woman with chin-length salt and pepper hair and a pink sleeveless shirt, stirring something at the stove. She is wearing gray wire-rimmed glasses.

Caregiver Questions Reason for Lab Work When Mother Doesn’t Want Treatment

Dear Carol: I’ve been helping my 84-year-old mom with her medications and doctor appointments. She’s made it plain that she doesn’t want any more...

Honor Your Older Adult’s Need for Independence

Although we may not think about it in these terms very often, a person’s dignity and identity are often tied to their independence. As...

Middle-aged woman lies back abainst white covered pillows. The's got short dark hair and large, dark-rimmed glasses and is wearing a dark pull-over sweater. Her hand it held up by her forehead and her expression is one of misery.

How to Engage in Self-Care While Grieving

Many caregivers watch their loved ones endure a long, slow decline that will eventually end in death. As they age, we grieve every mental...