Self-care

Background is a bright blue sky with clouds. An older woman with frizzy white hair is viewed from the back as she sits in a wheelchair looking up at the sky

You’re Not a Terrible Person If You’ve Secretly Wished Your Ill Loved One Could Die

Every so often, someone will admit that they secretly wish the person they’re caring for would pass away. Often, this person is sick, suffering,...

Older man in dark blue jacket with plaid lining showing around the color. Brown hair mixed with gray, blue eyes, looking like he's expecting the viewer to do something

Elders Who Abuse Their Family Caregivers: Yes – It Happens

Most of us have seen evidence of people being harder on those they love than they are on strangers or even people they don’t...

Shadow image of an older man in a bowler hat crossing a city street while using a cane

A Caregiver’s Struggle: Balancing an Elder’s Sense of Purpose with Their Safety

A recent question brought back memories from my early days of caregiving. The member wrote, “My 81-year-old father still thinks he can do handyman...

Nicely dressed older woman with gray hair. She's wearing makeup and pearls with a cream colored sweater. A younger woman with dark blonde hair in a messy bun sits by her, holding her hand and chatting with her.

Aging Life Professionals Can Help Swamped Caregivers Find Resources

Dear Carol: I feel like I’m failing everyone because I can’t do everything well. I work full-time, and my kids are in middle school,...

An adult daughter with brown hair and wearing a red dress is showing dancing with an older gray-haired man, likely her father. The background shows lovely spring trees and a gathering that could be in a park.

Spring and Summer Cleaning: How to Refresh Your Caregiving Routine

For many families, spring or early summer is a time to shake off the winter blues, deep clean their homes and focus on getting...

Imagine of book cover for Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. Background is is a room blurred in muted brown tones. Foreground is of the author's father - an older man with dark rimmed glasses looking aside with a pensive expression on his face. Arms folded across chest in a relaxed posture.

Alzheimer’s and Dementia Books: Best Reads for Family Caregivers

Note: I was interviewed by A Place for Mom about caregiving books, so I chose just some of my favorites (can’t name them all)....

Woman with long brown hair and glasses in front of a laptop computer. Her frustration shows as she bites down on a pencil placed horizontally in her mouth.

Siblings Who Feel Shut Out of Caregiving

There’s a great deal of anger in the world of family caregiving over siblings who don’t help care for their aging parents. Very often,...

Man and woman pointing fingers and yelling at each other. Look like adult siblings with brown hair and slightly Asian features

Adult Siblings Who Care More About Inheritance Than Parents’ Care

“We don’t want strangers taking care of Mom!” “We promised Dad he would never have to go to a nursing home!” “If you really...

Older man and woman, likely the grandparents, holding baby and toddler on their laps. Both grandparents have gray hair. Woman is wearing a purple sweater and man is wearing a pink shirt.

Balancing Caregiving with Other Relationships

Becoming a family caregiver is often something that either happens very suddenly or slowly sneaks up on a person. When a loved one has...

In the foreground we see a jumble of clothing, mostly in brown tones with some rush and cream. Behind the mess is a woman in a bulky coat in the same colors. We see some brownish hair on top of her head but her face is buried behind the jumbled clothing.

Rummaging: When People with Dementia Dig Through Drawers or Trash

Dear Carol: I’m struggling. My husband was always super neat, but Alzheimer’s gradually took away his ability to organize even the basics of living....