Shadowing with Dementia: When They Panic If You Are Out of Sight

Dear Carol: After my husband retired, he wanted to be involved in whatever I was doing, no matter how mundane. To me, that signified that he was bored. After we discussed this, he agreed, saying he wasn’t even aware that he had become so clingy. He started woodworking and grew to love it, so things evened out. Sadly, a few years back, he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and the disease has progressed rapidly. Now, he’s not just clingy, he won’t even let me go to the bathroom without him standing outside the door wanting to hear my voice. I love him, but this is driving me crazy. The doctor says this is just a phase, which may be so, but is there anything I can do? It might help to understand why this is happening. What are your thoughts? – VC

Dear VC: No matter how close people are everyone needs some privacy. What’s happening with your husband is called shadowing, and yes, this is “just a phase,” but it’s extremely hard on the caregiver.
Why does he do it? Though everyone…

Continue reading on Inforum for tips on how to calm a person who is shadowing:

Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories. “For anyone having to walk the last segments of life with a loved one, read this.” …Delores

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