How Do I Communicate Reminders to a Parent With Dementia?
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“Mom, remember, your appointment is tomorrow at 10.”
“I know. You already told me.”
Then an hour later:
“What time is my appointment again?”
For families caring for a parent with dementia or memory loss, conversations like this can happen over and over throughout the day.
Your parent isn’t ignoring you. They may genuinely understand the information when you tell them. The difficulty is remembering it later.
That can turn everyday things like appointments, medications, meals, visitors, and family plans into a constant cycle of phone calls and reminders.
And when you do not live nearby, it can feel even harder.
Why verbal reminders often aren’t enough
Many caregivers start by calling more often.
You call in the morning about an appointment. You call again before lunch. You send a text. You ask a sibling to check in.
Eventually, keeping everyone on the same page can become another caregiving job.
Text messages and smartphone reminders may work well for some older adults. But they are not always a good fit for someone living with memory loss.
Your parent may forget to check the phone. They may not hear a notification. They may struggle to open an app or remember what they were looking for.
Sometimes the best reminder is simply one that stays visible.
Put the information where your parent can see it
A visible reminder can answer a question without requiring your parent to remember a previous conversation.
Instead of expecting Mom to remember that you told her about Tuesday’s appointment, she can see:
“Doctor appointment today at 10:00 AM. Sarah will pick you up at 9:30.”
Or:
“Dad, I’ll call you after dinner tonight.”
Or:
“Your medication is next to your breakfast. Please take it as directed.”
The goal is not to overwhelm someone with information. It is to make the most important information easier to find when they need it.
Keep reminders short. Use familiar language. Focus on one clear message at a time.
This becomes especially important when you live far away
Long-distance caregiving comes with its own worries.
You may be managing appointments, checking in with neighbors, coordinating siblings, speaking with doctors, and trying to make sure your parent knows what is happening, all from another city or state.
You cannot always walk into the kitchen and leave a note on the counter.
That is one of the problems Memoryboard was designed to help solve.
Family members use the Memoryboard app from their own phone to send reminders, messages, appointments, and photos to a screen in their loved one’s home.
Your parent doesn’t need to download an app, check text messages, or learn to navigate a smartphone.
The information simply appears on their Memoryboard.
So if you suddenly learn that Mom’s appointment has moved to 2:00 PM, you can update the reminder even if you are hundreds of miles away.
Reminders can also provide reassurance
Caregiving communication is not always about tasks.
Sometimes the message someone needs most is:
“I love you. I’ll see you Saturday.”
“John is coming over this afternoon.”
“Everything is okay. I’ll call you tonight.”
For someone experiencing memory loss, uncertainty can lead to repeated questions or anxiety.
A familiar message that stays visible can provide a reference point throughout the day.
Families can also send photos, giving the screen a purpose beyond schedules and reminders. It can become another simple way to stay connected.
Keep the system simple
When introducing any new tool to someone with dementia, simplicity matters.
Place the display somewhere your parent already looks often, such as near the television, in the kitchen, or beside a favorite chair.
Then keep the messages consistent.
Instead of:
“Don’t forget that Dr. Smith changed your appointment from Wednesday morning to Tuesday at 10, and Mary said she can probably come get you around 9:15.”
Try:
“Doctor appointment today at 10:00 AM. Mary will pick you up at 9:15.”
Clear information is easier to understand at a glance.
Technology should reduce the work, not create more of it
Caregivers already manage enough.
A communication tool should not require your parent to remember passwords, open apps, respond to notifications, or learn an entirely new routine.
Memoryboard was created with that idea in mind.
The caregiver manages the information. The person receiving it simply sees what their family wants them to know.
It will not solve every challenge that comes with dementia. No single tool can.
But if you find yourself answering the same question ten times a day, worrying that Mom forgot tomorrow’s appointment, or trying to coordinate care from hundreds of miles away, a persistent visual reminder can make one part of caregiving easier.
Sometimes knowing “Mom can see the message” provides peace of mind for everyone.
Carol here: As this post is sponsored by Memoryboard, I’m marking it as such. That said, Memoryboard is one of those rare products that I can endorse without reserve.
The features are obvious
Memoryboard can help lower the stress felt by people with memory loss. It enables anyone in the care circle to easily post appointment times or reminders and directions for taking medications. Family can reassure them they are remembered and loved by posting personal notes and even pictures!
This is a fabulous tool for people aging in place with family help, as well as for spousal caregivers or others caring for someone with dementia in the home.
The clincher for me: Simplicity with no strings
*This app fills a need without trying to be everything to everybody. Easy to use; easy to integrate into the person’s routine.
*NO subscription cost. Buy the reasonably priced tablet, and that’s it! Well done, Memoryboard!
Note: This makes an incredibly helpful gift – Christmas, Hanukkah, or just because – and with no subscription, there is no awkward decision about who pays going forward. Seriously, consider Memoryboard!
