How to Support a Friend Who Has a Chronic Illness
Living with a chronic illness, such as cancer, heart disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), diabetes or an immune disorder, can be isolating and lonely. Chronically ill individuals not only face more daily challenges than their healthy peers, but their condition can also interfere with their ability to socialize and partake in activities they enjoy.
If you have a friend with a chronic illness, it’s important to be a source of support for them. However, it can be difficult to do this without coming off as if your friend is your “pet project.” Below are a few thoughts on how to be a good friend to someone who is facing a serious illness without being patronizing.
Tips for Supporting a Friend with a Chronic Illness
Know when they need you (and when they don’t). Learn to understand when your friend needs company and when they need to be alone to regroup. Individual personality traits play into this balance, of course, but most people who are chronically ill need the ability to choose between alone time and social time. The challenge is reading these cues and knowing when to push to be there for them and when to give them space. You won’t always be able to identify exactly what your friend needs, and that’s okay. Clear communication can help immensely, but a good rule of thumb is to always check in from time to time and convey your willingness to be there for them in person or via phone, text or email.
Don’t be offended when they don’t want to spend time with you. Don’t act hurt or impatient if your friend turns down your invitations to go out shopping or to get dinner and drinks. Chances are you aren’t being shunned. Living with a chronic illness takes management and self-care. Part of that self-care is saying no sometimes, even to the best of friends. Only they can fully understand how they’re feeling physically and…
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