Once Close Friends Often Drift Away after Dementia Diagnosis
Dear Carol: My 67-year-old mother struggles to care for her 75-year-old husband with Alzheimer’s. In many ways, things are going pretty well, but what I’ve picked up is that their long-time social friends have all but disappeared. One couple will call for a brief chat, but for the most part, old friends have become too busy for what were once regular get-togethers. I’ll admit that Dad can be unpredictable. He’s in the early to mid-stage of the disease, but his condition seems to fluctuate a lot. I’ve read where dementia caregivers become extremely lonely, and I see this in mom. Do you have any suggestions for how we can get their friends to be more attentive? Thanks for your help. – GK
Dear GK: Friends dropping by the wayside after a dementia diagnosis is so hard to see, yet so common. You are kind to want to help.
You might try connecting with them yourself, acknowledging how difficult it can be to know how to interact with your dad, but emphasizing that a visit would still mean the world to him. For your mom, it would be a show of support to acknowledge how challenging her role is, and a reminder that she still counts. While the article mentions memory care, the same principles work at home. Understand…
Helpful Tools:
Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories.“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose…I don’t want it to end.” …Craig William Dayton, Film Composer
Stay connected with Memoryboard: Designed by caregivers. Memoryboard helps families share reminders, messages, updates, and photos on an easy-to-use screen designed for people with dementia. Peace of mind for families, independence for loved ones.
Wetness indicator and alert to help manage incontinence with dignity. SenecaSense Home: Discreet Support That Restores Comfort and Confidence
Leslie Kernisan, MD, MPH, has opened up support! View two free caregiving webinars that can help you help your older parents (and yourself).
Discover the Difference. EGOSAN: The premium incontinence brand caregivers love: They save work! Now Available on Amazon.
